Well missy, you can get back on your horse and ride straight outa town, cos there ain’t no room for you on my ranch. I’ve seen you trying to seduce me from afar, but your efforts will come to nothing. You can take a naked dip in the pool. You can do stretching exercises in a Tuscan kitchen. You can squeeze your titties together and you can even struggle to take off a pair of jeans and I won’t come to your aid. For I am Lethario and I’m too lazy to be your lover.

It has come to my attention that you, like so many before you, believe you can seduce me via cyberspace. Well think again Missy. You see, you can lick your tits as much as you like. You can rip your fishnet stockings if you wish. You can hide your tits behind a heart-shaped cushion and you can even try to beat me at my own game by playing Lazy On The Beach, but you will never seduce me. You see Muriel, I am Lethario and I’m way too lazy to be your lover.

You won’t learn will you Perla? I will never be your lover, so long as my name is Lethario. You can squeeze your tits together as much as you like. You can pose with a massive necklace around your breast and I still won’t be moved. You can hide your nipples while flashing your bits and it won’t matter. You can even lie on a desk with your legs in the air and I won’t change my mind. For I am Lethario and I’m too lazy to be your lover.

Bless ya Vanessa! You don’t know when you’re beaten do ya? But I must put you out of your misery by confirming that your efforts to seduce me are in vain. You can wear butterfly stockings and heels as much as you want. You can bite on a wooden spoon if you really want to. You can do things with apples indefinitely and you can even bash your head between two saucepan lids and I won’t budge. For I am Lethario and I’m too lazy to be your lover.

You’ve made countless attempts to lure me, but I’m afraid I’m gonna have to dispappoint you Kinga. There is no way we will ever be lovers. You can bend over on the rocks as much as you like. You can play with your tits as often as you wish. You can stand naked in front of the fireplace, and you can even cook me a naked romantic dinner, but I will not be seduced. For I am Lethario and I am way too lazy to be your lover.

This may come as a shock to you, if you’ve never read my blog, but I’m afraid your attempts to seduce me are in vain. I’ve noticed how you sought to grab my attention by wearing crotchless trousers that look like a chess board. I’ve seen you wearing nothing but high-heels in an attempt to lure me. Well, you can perch on a window ledge in black stockings and you can bend over a stool as much as you want, but you won’t get me. For I am Lethario and I’m too lazy to be your lover.

I write to ask you not to bother flirting with me anymore. I’ve had enough. I’ve seen you prancing around in the garden. I’ve also noticed you getting all acrobatic in bed, in a bid to win my attention. None of it sways me. You can lay down with your legs in the air. You can do the splits on the kitchen table. You can pose in sexy black stockings or even kiss an ugly mannequin but I won’t be changing my mind. For I am Lethario and I’m too lazy to be your lover.

What are you doing Viki? You should know by now that I will never be your lover. Have you never read my blog? I’ve seen you sliding your leg up a bannister on the staircase. I’ve seen you wearing crotchless stockings and high heels. I’ve seen you doing gymnastics on the floor and I’ve seen you posing naked with another gal. But you know what? None of it tempts me as I am Lethario and I’m too lazy to be your lover.

I’ve become increasingly aware of your attempts to lure me and I write to ask you to refrain from firting with me anymore, as it will get you nowhere. You can relax naked on an inflatable as much as you want. You can shower yourself with water from a hosepipe till the cows come home. You can spread your legs on the kitchen table and you can even pose naked in front of a beautiful landscape. All of it will be in vain however, for I am Lethario and I am way too lazy to be your lover.

Please stop flirting Lea as it will get you nowhere with me. It doesn’t matter how cute you look crouching by the fireplace. It doesn’t matter if you can hold up an arch with your bare hands. It makes no difference if you shout your love from the rooftop, or if you bend over on the railway track to show me your bits. You can even stick a giant fan between your legs and I won’t be swayed. For I am Lethario and I am way too lazy to be your lover.