Archive for November, 2008

Not Anya Life

Dear Anya @ MPL Studios,

I regret to inform you that I will not be your lover. Not today. Not tomorrow. Not ever. And there is nothing you can do that will change my mind. You can swing from a tree on the beach, wearing a skimpy bikini. You can play with your hair in a girly sort of way. You can emerge like a phoenix from the bathtub. You can even sit on the beach with your legs spread-eagled, while water laps at your bits and I won’t be swayed. For I am Lethario and I am way too lazy to be your lover.

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No Reception For Ariel

Ariel at Watch4BeautyDear Ariel @ Watch4Beauty,

It has come to my attention that you want me. There’s no point in denying it. It’s as clear as the night sky. But your efforts are futile. You can grasp your tits as much as you like. You can prance around naked taking photos with your girlfriend. You can even touch another girl’s tits but it won’t matter to me. You may swish your hair about and you can cover your bits with furry pink hearts. You can even wear a silly hat. But it is all in vain my dear, for I am Lethario and I’m too lazy to be your lover.

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Hard Luck Jenni

Dear Jenni @ Femjoy,

Don’t hold your breath darling, because I will never be your lover. Even though you clearly want me, I’m afraid I must decline. Sure, you can pose nude in the forest. Sure, you can bend over on some steps to show me your bits. You can even make a half-arsed attempt to fly while your girlfriends stand around laughing at you. But I won’t be moved. You can lie legs akimbo in a doorway for all I care because I am Lethario and I’m too lazy to be your lover. P.S. don’t forget to clean the bath before you go.

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My Apologies Patricia

Patricia at Hegre ArtDear Patricia @ Hegre Art,

I’m writing to inform you that I will not be your lover, despite your obvious intentions otherwise. You’ve tried to impress me on many occasions, but your efforts are in vain. You can get it on with a cute blonde as much as you like. You can pose legs akimbo, covered in oil, until the cows come home. You can put on sexy black stockings if you want, but I won’t budge. You can even pose with a big pink ball, but i won’t be moved. For while I might admire you from afar, I am Lethario, too lazy for lovers.

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